I go to work just to get out of the house. Work is a place I always feel comfortable and I know what to do. However today I am feeling so out of it from being tired, being in pain and still adjusting to this alcohol free way of being that I can’t function. I wander around my office after my one client unsure of what to do. It takes me twenty minutes to write a thank you note and put it in an envelope.
I go home feeling completely depressed and take a three hour nap. When I get up we have dinner and watch back to back episodes of True Detective. Somehow this makes me feel better- watching TV drama about pretend crimes that are so gruesome they feel real. When I walk through my yard the next day looking at all the fallen tree branches and debris, I can’t help but think about the head-pieces from the show that some of the victims wore when they were killed.
But while I am watching the show, I am not thinking about drinking and that makes me happy, especially since it is St. Patricks Day Weekend (well the holiday itself is on Monday) but most of our friends are out celebrating early. I am not – by choice – and I am ok with that.