Day 40 – Out of the Wilderness

Day 40 – Easter Sunday and our last day in Madison, WI where we’ve been celebrating my aunt and uncle’s 50th wedding anniversary. We wake up late and despite no alcohol I have the now familiar sugar hangover. I guess sugar will be my newest thing to regulate or give up. Time will tell.

We meet the family for brunch at a place on the lake called Sardine. It is pretty busy with after church folks and a number of families. We have a reservation for a fairly private corner for our family group of 24. On the way over I talked to my cousin Suzy about not drinking for all this time and my desire to toast her parents, to be a part of the moment. She says its likely there will be a toast at some point, probably with mimosas and says I don’t need to feel any pressure to order one.

Though mimosas aren’t my favorite, once we sit down I decide I do want one. It’s time to see what will happen if I have a cocktail and a mimosa seems fun, festive and celebratory. It comes out with a strawberry on the side of the glass and an orange twist on top. I have a few sips and immediately feel a little light headed. Throughout the brunch I have about half of it and feel even more light-headed, bordering on dizzy. I don’t like it and don’t even finish it.

By an hour later I have a headache that could easily turn into a migraine, another big sign that drinking is not a good thing for me. But I have to admit, the feeling of wanting to like the way I felt after drinking some of the mimosa – or wanting to drink something else to find the feeling I do like – is back stronger than it has been in weeks. I worry that I’m going to have to start the whole detoxing process again and am dreading it.

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